One day Satan and Jesus were having a conversation. Satan had just departed from the Garden of Eden, and he was gloating and boasting.
“Yes, sir, I just caught a World full of people down there. I set me a trap and used a little bait. I knew they couldn’t resist. Got ‘em all!”
“What are you going to do with them?” Jesus asked.
Satan replied, “Oh, I’m gonna have fun! I’m gonna teach them how to marry and divorce each other, how to hate and abuse each other, how to drink and smoke and curse. I’m gonna teach them how to invent guns and bombs and kill each other. I’m really gonna have fun!”
“And what will you do when you get done with them?” Jesus asked.
“Oh, I’ll kill ‘em,” Satan glared proudly.
“How much do you want for them?” Jesus asked
“Oh, you don’t want those people. They ain’t no good. See, you’ll take them and they’ll just hate you. They’ll spit on you, curse you then kill you. You don’t want those people!!”
“How much?” He asked again.
Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, “All your blood, tears, and your life.”
Jesus said without hesitation, “DONE!”
Then He paid the price.
- Isn’t it funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the World’s going to Hell?
- Isn’t it funny how someone can say “I believe in God” out and still follow Satan?
- Isn’t it funny how you can re-post a thousand jokes through blogs and they spread like wildfire, but when you start posting messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing?
- Isn’t it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me.
- I pray, for everyone who re-posts this, they will be blessed by God in a way special for them
- If You Love God… And, are not ashamed of all the marvelous things HE has done for you…
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.
Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl.
“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you”— Psalm John 15:18-19